Hi Everyone,

I guess I should probably write about valentines day but I am all but freaking sick of talking about valentines day esp since it is in Febuary a month I am currently aggressivly feuding with because it is cold and also making me overdrink (just like that January f*cker).

Yesterday I walked around queen st where I used to live and work and that was cool except I felt a little un-cool as a person. NOT that I was setting any coolness records when I was on Queen st but still there were some people who looked identifiably cooler than me yesterday (by "some people" I mean pretty much everyone except those goth/punk kids). I was going to try to see million dollar baby before some jagoff accidently tells me whatever the shocking twist I keep hearing about is but it was a nice day so I went shopping instead. I also ran into L____ one of our ballerina friends and who was nice enough to go shopping with me for 2 hours without complaining about someone being a jerk once. Oh before I forget

TOP LIKELY SHOCKING TWISTS FROM MILLION DOLLAR BABY

1. she actually auctions her baby off for one million dollars to rich fight promoters who want the baby because it has good boxing genes.- I guess this wouldn't be a shocking twist so much because the title of the film is million dollar baby

2. she doesn't auction off her baby for one million dollars- despite the film's title suggesting that she does

3. The million dollar baby is a monster with guns for hands- she has to box it to save clint eastwood.

4. some people kill the morgan freeman character and then display him outside of thier bar and then clint eastwood finds out and drinks a bunch of delicous whisky and then shoots everyone in a 4 seconds period just like in unforgiven- I am crossing my fingers for this one

5. later on during the oscar's I shockingly dont freak out when somebody says hillary swank gained 25 pounds of muscle in 6 weeks to prepare for this roll.- this is impossible by the way but even it she did gain like 8 pounds I dont see how this is the hieght of the actors craft. Even more annoying is when rene zillwigger gains 25 pounds to play Bridget Jones (using the "temporarily stopped starving herself" technique) and then all the girls in my office are like "oooh I wish I could be an actor and get paid to gain eat tons and gain 25 pounds" and I am like "heh heh yeah, except for the 99.5% of girl actors who would be unemployed if they gained 10 pounds"
For the record what I am trying to say is that crictics and the academy are really impressed when people change thier appearance but I would counter that it is basically a celebraties job to constantly change thier apearance from its natural state so why should I be impressed if they have done this in a slightly different way.

Oh also the best oscar game to play is to give everyone an imaginary gun which they can use to shoot anyone on the screen. The catch is that you only have two or three imaginary bullets. Imagine how stupid you would feel if you went ahead and shot john travolta (it looked like he was going to start dancing) and one of the girls from The View but then you were out of bullets when Tom Cruise started talking about how after the last samari he now lives his life according to the tenants of Samari bushido (in addition, we can assume, to the tenants of scientology) CRAP!

I was actually talking to a friend about this and she suggested that the scientologist might not mind this and could use Bushidotologist Cruise to hunt down and sword-assasinate the enimies of scientology. Like if I was in a bar talking about what a load shit scientology is then the next day Tom Cruise would find me at hart house basketball and cut my head off in front of the other players.

OK so I am way off topic. what I was saying is that I didnt feel especially cool shopping on queen st. I was almost compelled to rectify this by purchasing a $60 vintage belt buckle but then I remembered that I have to save money so I can (not) take my (non-existant) girlfriend out for valentines dinner (im working). Actually I liked my current belt buckle better so I passed and also It was kind of annoying that the shop girls were hitting on L___ more than me. Speaking of Annoying, L____ was kind enough to tell me that her Ballarina friend who I though I let go by not calling her becuase I had two much stuff going on actually had let me go because she liked some other dude. I actually met this guy and he is pretty good looking so that is ok plus he has a full length sleeve tatoo which L_____ explained makes a guy 2-3 times hotter. Ben and I are going to get twin sleeve tatoos ASAP I am thinking VIKING theme but ben thinks that might have been co-oped by racists.
The highlights of shopping trips were both in so-called west queen west where I finally got to see the kick ass stores of my friends Jeff who part owns BLACK DOG VIDEO and Kelan who part owns 69 VINTAGE. Please go to thier establishments. The non-plug highlight of my shopping was going back to NEW YORK SUBWAY which is delicous.

in other news Ross Ian Cam and Darcy were in town last night. We went to teds collision were they are re-stocked with delicous giant 50s. dustin was also randomly there and jason came to meet us. We later went to Lounge 88 but that is a little hazy.

In other news i finally got a haircut today. It is ok mabye a little shorter than I wanted. My stylist Shana decribing the 16 hour tatooing process she is currently in the middle of did nothing to solidify my twin sleeve tatoo plan. I also worked out today and ran into erica's mom who is in town for the week. We had a nice talk except for when I talked about how I was working a lot on weekends and then she said "oh yeah I heard about how that was one of the things that was wrong..." and then trailed of leaving the rest of the sentence (with you that is... one of the hundred things) unfinished. I am just kidding Ericas mom is actually very sweet and funny.

Ok so tommorow I am going to serve a bunch of couples where the girl is pissed that she is spending valentines day at a pub. Right now I have to go (all of the usually argumentitive voices in my head have made peace and are currently singing an 8 part harmonious chorus about how it there is only 1 hour remaining before the bars of ontario offer last call for alchoholic beverages to thier patrons.) Happy Valentines Day!!!