What is up Quadrathlon Fans,

I will try to run down the Pettigrew Post quadrathlon / Birthday Party Later. For now lets look at how the first annual pettigrew quadrathlon went.... It went well.

Ok so the festivities did start about an hour and a half late but that is not bad for somthing that Ben and I put together. I was a nice day etc so I had no reservations in wearing my smaller track shorts winning me whatever props you get for being the dude with the shortest shorts (second place: Ben). I also had spent the last 25 min before the event self-tatooing flames on both ankles with red marker and orange and yellow highlighters so I am pretty sure that I had the intimidation thing going (and I definitly had the girl spectaters thinking I am super hot thing going). I also settled on only 25mg of effedrine which I thought was a fair amount although I wansn't nearly as hopped-up as I like to be going into this type of event. I might have gone for no effidrine AT ALL but I was fealing a little tired and stiff from the night before so bring on the short-cuts.

Rather than a recap by event I think we should go by participant:

THE COMPETITORS: (by Finish Order)

Andrew "The Ninja" Swartz: 1st Place 100m, 1st Place Long Jump, 1st Place 400m, 4th place Shot Put.
--- As predicted Swartz kicked all kinds off ass despite having terrible long jump and shot put technique. As a X ofsaa level sprinter Swartz did seem to have an extra gear as compared to the rest of the competitors and like 6 more gears than Fry and Randy. Also despite being jacked as hell Swartz's track outfit was rather conservative (a virtual parka by Luke standards) it is like he is allergic to scoring but we will talk about that later in the party review where for the 35th straight party Swartz refused to take his shirt off despite all the girls BEGGING him to do so. I am no where near as jacked as Swartz and I gear down at parties if it looks like no girls will call the police. ALLERGIC

Cam "Babe" Neil: 2nd Place 100m, 2nd Place Shot Put, 4th Place Long Jump, 4th Place 400m
--- As an X high school sprinter, middle distance runner and shot putter, Cam was really the only threat to Swartz in this event but apperently has been pretty busy lately and not training as much as usual. I was a little disapointed when Cam died in the 400 specifically considering he was SOSAA CHAMPION (sosaa meaning southern ontario) in this event in high school (the first fucker who sends me a note reminding me that high school was 9 years ago gets a full week of trashing on this blog). Anyway Cam rocked in the 100 and shot and probably would have done better except his fan club could not make it (ROSS and DARCY). Actual quote from Cam: "I mean I was coming around the last corner and Luke was flying by me like a train on steriods and I think I could have stayed with that freaking ninja-war-gazelle if only someone was there to say "go BABE" "You can do it BABE" or "BABE beat that filthy Pettigrew BABE""
Babe by the way is pronounced more like "BEYB" but also pronounced as quickly as possible so as to allow the maximum # of BABES spoken per hour.

Luke "LMONEY" Pettigrew: 3rd Place Long Jump, 3rd Place 400m, 4th Place 100, 5th Place shot put.
---- ok so I am not thrilled with my performance but what the hell. I definitly think I could have gotten 3rd in the sprint except I kept tripping on my own legs (I am going to present this as a random thing holding me down rather than an occurance that is spastically my fault. ) Also I think I should have won the 400 and definitly should not have lost to lunch-box.

Ben "Lunch-Box" Pettigrew: 2nd Place 400, 3rd Place 100, 3rd Place shot Put, 7th Place long jump.
--- technically Ben actually TIED me for 3rd place so we will now call this section of the post "twinbarresing".
Ben won the Law School division which with no offence intended was not that competitive. What might have been more competitive is if we had the Law kids compete in a relay race against say like really athletic 8 year olds or did special challenge matches like: "Randy in long jumping competition against blindfolded stranger picked randomly from the street who doesn't know her or she is involved in a long jumping competition" oooh enthralling, Randy should win but I wouldn't bet money on it...

Mark "the track pounder" Irwin: 1st place shot put, 2nd place long jump, 5th place 100m, 400m still running.
--- Marks throw of 46 feet in the shot may stand as a pettigrew quadrathlon record for a while. Mars also had a great long jump of 14'10 wich managed to beat my best jump by 1" and therefore depriving me of the twin championship.
Mark actually beat a lot of people in the 400 as well despite looking the least like a 400m runner of all competitors.

Dean "what the fuck" Embry: 6th Place overall.
As we get down into the loser's bracket of the competition it is hard to remember who came where so I will just try to list the overall finish placing. I apoligize to anyone who actually came 8th and I had you at 10th or somthing but put in perspective they are both horrible finish positions so stop drawing attn to yourself.
---- All things considered Dean had a wildly successfull Quadrathlon and by all things considered I don't mean "oh he had a slight cold" but rather I mean "oh he smokes a pack and a half of death-brand cigarettes daily and hasn't exercised in 6 years while constantly eating crap" things considered. Deans best event was the long jump where his 6'1 120 pound frame was more "floaty" than most competitors.

Will "I talked too much trash while not actually realizing what this track stuff entails" Robinson: 7th overall
- HMMMM GOOD TIMES AT THE NERDERY. This cant be what Will had in mind for the decathlon where his pettigrew-beating asperations were crushed in a devestating flash of fire-legged brilliance and his assumed position as king of the nerdery was also taken from him. Will did turn out a pretty good 400 but was a little disapointing for a strong dude in the shot and sprint.
Losing to your roomate in the quadrathlon (assuming your roomate is Dean) is like having your younger brother steal your girlfriend. Its technically possible but you would just assume it could never happen so when it does happen in front of all of your friends you are like "THIS FREAKING BLOWS" (and it does Will so next year you better step up)

Julian "im not exactly a linebacker anymore" Jubenville- 8th overall
---- I am not sure if Julian or joel came 8th but like I said "WHICHEVER"
Julian has been doing a lot of distance training this year which I think has robbed him of his football explosivness.

Joel "East Coast Fury" (what the hell nobody ever tells me Joel's last name)- 9th overall
---- I honestly expected a lot more from Joel because he has been looking pretty jacked lately. I wont trash talk him for being ninth yet because I think he may have a strong showing next year.

Aaron "Super-Size" Fry- 10th overall
---- Fry was a pretty athletic dude when we were in school but those days are really behind him (also behind him: 35 pounds of star-burger filled ass). I have been trying to impart my weight loss tips to him (step one: exit gainfull employment step two: make with the ephidrine) but he wont listen.
Fry does deserve credit for showing up for an event which he clearly wanted no part of. I will put him in the Joel catagory for most likely to make a huge jump next year.

Randy "Big Pappy" Martin- 11th overall
---- next time I am talking to a girl and Randy starts to "chisel" on her I am pulling out a picture of Randy Long-Jumping.

KATHERINE "KC" CORNETT- 1st overall GIRLS DIVISION
--- KATHERINE CORNETT managed to beat several boys in the 400. KATHERINE CORNETT was not pleased to be the only girl competeing although several girls have assured me they want to challenge her for the title next year.



THE OFFICIALS

Ryan "The Matador" Knox:
--- While a ill-advised trip to our favorite after hours place the night before assured that Knox was too drunk to compete AT 4:30 THE NEXT DAY he did do a good job marshalling the 100 meter dash and shot put.

Sandon "other ninja" Shogilev:
--- Half of the Long Jump team lucky enough to witness my destruction of Ben. (this by the way should have been very predictable in a newtonian kind of way. mabye next year we can have the lunar long jump to give ben a chance)
Sandon couldn't participate because of somthing gross going on with his leg which I didn't want to hear about.

Sean "the surgeon" H. (sp????)
---- The other half of the long jump team who I believe was too hung-over to compete. Sean was wearing 3 layers and a toque in 25o conditions so we will now refer to him as anti-luke dresser.


The Spectators/Photojournalists:

January and Ashley:
--- Seem to be around a lot lately but this is not a gossip page and LukeWorld appreciates thier company so thanks for coming and for taking my picture specifically.

Lyndsay and Maiga:
--- If I was thinking I would have grabbed a before shot of Lyndsay for an anti-binge drinking advertisment. Thanks to Lynds and Maiga for the birthday gifts. Also Maiga happy belated birthday from yesterday.

Jaimie:
--- wins the photojournalism award for being able to process pictures in time for our party.

Erica: Winner of the "piss off KATHERINE CORNETT who since she was the only girl competing didn't like how the other girls got to wear "kicky" summer outfits to spectate" award
--- also thanks for defending me against those who would attack my super-sexy track and field outfit. I will leave my thanks there since blog readers have been attacking the amount of coverage Erica gets which I personally dont feel is inordinate considering that this blog is just a string of lame reflections on how I spent my day.


OK so that took forever but it is not like my trip to the Value Village to look for an 80s style "boom-box" couldn't wait 20 min. I will try to recap the party some time tonight.