apparently my lack of posting has led to speculation that I am actually dead.
Im not dead.
without any delay here is what is up in my life categorically...

Work: I still work at the D#ke of Y*rk, Toronto's original fake english pub.
As some of you will remember they hired me because I drank there all the time and it has worked out so far especially because they no longer attempt to have me work during the day.
I am working aproximatly 5 days per week plus I host the trivia night on tuesdays.
Also I have started to draw cartoons again so watch out family circus.

Family: My sister Jen is now a multi-media toronto celebrity appearing regularily in print and on television in "ask doctor Jen" style features. I have yet to see her most regular gig on CBC telivision because it runs before noon. The killer part about my sister is that she is probably the only person in toronto under 40 who doesn't seem to care about becoming famous. My parents have just purchased an eliptical machine which is a suspiciously normal thing for ones 60 year old parents to do so I will have to figure out what is actually up.
I still live with my brother (and our friend Julian and Marks brother Phil) in a pretty cool apartment although one of the tenents is pretty messy and constantly has late night parties with his tanked-up bar co-workers. Ben has been made permenant at the gov. which most people take as an excuse to get desk-fat but unfortunatly ben has also been working out a lot in a desperate bid to make me look bad by comparison.

Health: I had a nosebleed the other day which I was pretty sure was the stroke I have hypocondrially waiting for since I was 15 but it turns out it was just the new gum on the market. I didnt really figure it out untill i got a nosebleed again the next day when I was chewing the same gum (also my friend kim got one as well). The gum is either dentyne EXTREME or chlorettes EXTREME I forget. At first I was pissed off because the gum made me think I was having a stroke but honestly now i am cool because at least one product labelled as "EXTREME" finally has some element of risk associated with it. It will be a shame when they pull the product next week because of a massive nosebleed epidemic (you heard it here first).
Also I have been working out but am still kind of scrawny/chubby. I am trying to lose a bunch of weight so that I am really thin and cool and can prompt exchanges like this:

Hot Girl #1: look at that guy he is really thin and cool

Hot Girl #2: I agree completly do you think he is on herion?

Hot Girl #1: Im not sure and the mystery surrounding his potential herion use is making me more attracted to him

Hot Girl #2: Me too I want to make out with him

Hot Girl #1: I saw him first! why dont you just go and make out with his twin brother

Hot Girl #2: his brothers healthy looking muscles are a huge turnoff I would rather make out with no one


anyway we are still a few weeks away.
I think my health is pretty good in general plus I have quit smoking now for well over a year and a half so that is ok. I am currently tring to tackle my social and medicinal use of alchohol but that is not going quite as well.



Relationships: Suprisingly working 6 nights a week isnt really allowing me to date that much which is too bad because I am getting early rumblings that spring 2006 might be a "restructuring" and unless I can pull my head off the bar for long enough to look around I am going to miss it just like the last restructuring (summer or fall 2004 depending on which catagory of dater you fall into). Speaking of I am still friends with Erica whom was with me for the bulk of this blog and is now articaling at a prestiegous downtown litigation firm. We even have fun dates like "meet me a the airport my suitcase is heavy" and "meet me at the grocery store my groceries are heavy"


Hobbies: None

ok I have been watching a lot of movies in futile attempts to fall asleep without delicous booze but that really isnt a hobby.
I have also been drawing stuff which is a hobby but also so much of a toronto cliche hipster thing (I freaking hate that word and trendster and scenester, we need a word for people who annoy you instantly for some reason and then you are in there house later and find an "idea book" with a bunch of horrible grade 7 looking drawings in it and you arent supprised at all- I nominate "imnotsuprisedyoudrawstuffster" and that goes double for the "imnotsuprisedyouadultcoloursters) that I feel like puking- also no disrespect to actual working artists.
Also my basketball game is in shambles. I dont want to talk about it but I will probably be golfing within 3 years.
wow my entry just turned sour in a hurry and in the hobby section to boot. you would think I would have gone sour in the "work" or "relationship" section but here we are just in time for...

World Events:

our new prime minister is pretty creepy looking. I actully voted for the NDP this year instead of just telling everybody I voted for the NDP so that was pretty cool. it was pretty fun at the polling station to hang out for 45min in the "dont have your shit together/late registration line" as well just to see the people in your nieghbourhood (Conclusion: the annex is white as hell I was starting to feel racist just for living there.)
ok so I am not up on world events but i do have a couple of observations...
Mining Disaster??? really??? what year is this 1875?
i sure am glad that New Orleans is fine now

thats it I really need to read a newspaper.
We do get fox news now with is freaking awesome but not a reliable source of information by any standards concievable.


ok so there it is my first blog entry in a while just so everyone
is clear that I am alive at least untill the next devastating LCBO stella tall tin sale.
If you find it depressing that you have just been updated on 9 months of my life in 3 min then you can imagine how I feel.

Luke