Hey Blog-Fans,

Well it is the day after St Patricks Day so I have decided to break my 3 week blog silence to review yesterday's important celebration of St Patricks birthday or the day he died or the day he finally drove the snakes out of Ireland. I do know that St Patrick was instrumental in converting the pagan Irish masses to Christianity which was mainly accomplished by changing the regular boring Christian cross to the super more kick-ass Celtic cross (the one with the circle around it) (this is actually true). If I was Irish and hundreds of years ago and someone told me that I got to wear a awesome Celtic Cross around all day and all I had to do was abandon my age old earth based religious beliefs I would sign up for sure.

I think that I will review St Patricks Day in popular timeline format.


11:32 am: Wake up slightly hung over because I was hanging out in Adams bar all night. Thanks Adam.

11:59 am: Arrive at work ON TIME which I manage to do every day here but accomplished about 10% of the time at MBS. I am not sure why this is but it probably is related to my boss at Groovy not asking me to work 1-8 hrs per day of unpaid overtime.

2:45 pm: lunchtime and the guy at the subway gives me an extra bonus stamp by accident SCORES!!!! I also switched up my routine by using the facilities at chapters. The kid in the stall next to me was only about 9 but he was making grown-up style dump noises like "AAARGH" which was pretty funny.

3:17 pm: back at work and now I am getting pretty excited about St Patricks Day. Two girls come in wearing those Guinness hats and all green and I was like "ALL RIGHT ST PATRICKS DAY!!!! Are you guys going to drink a TON of BOOZE tonight or what?" and they were like "we are only 17"

8:30 pm: finally leaving work. I am pretty sure I have fucked up the cash but there is no way I am redoing it because I am in serious need of getting the hell over to the duke so I am not playing "catch-up" all night.

8:40 pm: amatos. I think they are a little pissed that subway has taken a lot of my business from them but that it what you get for not having little stamps

8:50 pm: thankfully steph has thrown my laundry in the dryer which was a big time saver. I try to save further time by doubling up on talking to erica on the phone and taking D2 but she is tipped off when I flush the toilet.

9:15 pm: with last night finally purged, erica not too annoyed, and a sole slice of amatos ready to do battle with the desert storm like forces of booze about to accompany it, I leave the house. I am wearing my favorite Larry bird t-shirt which is only kind of StPatricksDayee but kicks all kinds extra ass to make up for whatever it might be lacking in four leaf clovers. It turns out that only Knox Sloan and Candice would bother to wear event specific clothing anyway so I was ok.

9:37 pm: Finally at the Duke!!! but i have to briefly line up.

9:40 pm: In the bar!!!
9:41 pm: Mark has an extra beer and he gives it too me. He would later infer that it was understood that I was supposed to pay him for it. HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA We have a pretty good table going with Dean Will Catherine Ben Matt and Lisa Ryan and Liz and Mark. right after I showed we are also joined by Dennis (see the Dennis Lim Blog) and Candace and Megan. Now we are really rolling and everyone seems to be in good spirits. I suspect that the other mega tables are jealous of us because we look so cool and because there are girls at our table.

9:42 pm: Liz asks who Larry Bird is.
9:43 pm: Liz further mentions that she has discovered this blog and I am like "oh cool I am glad you enjoy it" but as usual in my head I am like "fuck did I write shit about Liz in here?" I probably did somewhere but there is so much garbage that it would take her hours to find it.

9:49 pm: first pint finished. I may want to slow down my pint every 8min pace but it seems to be working so far.
9:50pm: Knox mentions he has just gotten back from a 3 week trip to Costa Rica. FUCK OFF!!! I want to go on vacation.

9:52pm: Mark tries to put my kick-ass new puma finger band (it is like a wrist band except for your finger) around his wrist which is like a normal persons leg. I am trying to hid how upset I am getting that Mark is trashing a $2.50 peice of apparel but it is not working. Thanks to Lisa for fixing it afterwards.

10:05pm: The eighth person of the evening asks me where Erica is tonight. For the record she was preparing for court and had no intrest in taking a timeout from her trial prep to come to the duke despite the fact that I purchased her a sexy vintage Celtics T-shirt last summer specifically for this occasion. I guess there are probably some people out there who aren't as enthusiastic about St Patricks day as I am but you wouldn't think I would be dating one of them. As a side note Erica won her trial and even got to argue applicability of case law with the crown like on the practice! Also the practice sucks like crazy now. Also Average Joe III: Adams Return is really sucking so far.

10:30pm: "Catch-up" period is officially over and "leading the charge" period has begun. Sandon, Sean and Mike arrive as well taking the seats vacated by matt and ryan and liz and lisa.

11:00pm: Mark loses $20 betting on Sandon to beat Ben in an arm wrestle. What is the Washington generals record this year?

12:00midnight: the duke girls buy me a tequila shot which was just what I needed becuase you dont want to be under-drunk on St Patricks day of all days

1:00am: we are now down to Will, Sandon, Sean, Mike and Myself. As usual I have no idea what they are talking about (usually income tax reform I think) but being super bombed am required to add my 35cents into the conversation.

1:30am: I now have only two cigarettes left (which i will clearly need for the walk home) so I deftly pocket them and start borrowing cigarettes from my friends. In retrospect this is a kind of a jerk move.

2:00am: as usual we are the last people at the bar except for staff so it may be time to go. Like a booze-fuelled stink missile I head straight for Ericas because I know that she worries about my safety if I dont come back to her place plus I really should wish her good luck on her trial tomorrow.

2:05am: Oh WAIT a minute erica actually hates it when I come back to her place after the bar and If I remember correctly specifically requested that I dont come back to her place super-drunk and reeking like booze and cigarettes. I abort plan A and head straight for the dominion where luckily for myself and other customers they are selling 6 cans of assorted chef-boyRD products for only $4. I had originally planned on getting something that I could eat instantly but that is a really good deal. It takes me about 45 seconds to get my airmiles card out of my wallet which could happen anytime so it was really unfair for the check-out girl and people in line behind my to assume that I was fumbling so much because I was drunk (in fact there was a lot of static friction occurring b/t that and my health card).

2:45am: I am home and eat a conservative 2 out of my 6 mini-ravioli bounty. I then dutifully WAIT A MINUTE THIS POST BECAME BORING A LONG TIME AGO WHY ARE YOU STILL READING.

next post: Luke wins big in 2nd bi-monthly pokerfest: hires 400 pound man to try on Mark's apparel items and stretch them out.